Find your voice + Use It
I spent Friday afternoon with a super inspiring, diverse group of women at BMW leading a discussion on the topic, "Finding Your Voice + Using It." A woman (aka my friend Lauren:)) started the women's group to build a supportive space to help women grow in their careers.
The women really opened up about their challenges when it came to speaking up, but they also shared their INCREDIBLE victories! It was super refreshing to hear their stories, not only about standing up for their own truths, but how they support other women in the room when they've needed help getting their points across. #MAJORPROGRESS
One of the biggest takeaways & themes from the workshop was for women to stop apologizing. This is not a new or revolutionary concept, but I notice that despite many of us hearing this message for years, WE STILL DO IT (myself included).
Why? Short answer - women default to being nice and there are a lot of nuances in the ways we actually say “sorry.” So in this workshop, we drilled one step deeper (and I bet Rachel Hollis does too in her latest book, haven’t read it though:)). To give you a couple ideas, I invite you to:
Stop apologizing for being you. Take the compliment, don’t deflect. Own your awesomeness.
Stop apologizing for speaking up. Don’t start that sentence with sorry.
Stop apologizing for your “unlikable” view point if you believe it’s true & right.
Stop apologizing for taking up space - the person clearly bumped into you (not vice versa - stay quiet, I dare you).
Stop apologizing after someone interrupts you, and you "interrupt" to take back the mic. Say, “wait, I wasn’t finished making my point.”
Stop apologizing for telling someone you don’t appreciate the way they just labeled your personality (driven, ambitious, assertive, bossy, loud, or anything else…). They’re the ones who owe you an apology.
Stop beating yourself up for not speaking up again, apologize to yourself (that’s when apologies are very important:)) and use your VOICE next time!!!
What you’ve got to say is really important, especially if you’re the type who rarely speaks up. Use all that wisdom you’ve gathered over the years.
And remember, I’m sending you LOTS of love & courage to share what’s on that intelligent, creative, & influential mind of yours.
Yes, I’m talking about yours.